Transformation

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The most beautiful butterflies have an ugly history.

Before they had colorful wings, they were grey.

They didn’t choose to be grey but that’s how life made them.

First they were worms and then life locked them inside a shell, temporarily killed them.

But only the momentary death unveiled their true glory,

the abandonement of what they grew up to be showed what they were meant to be.

Do not think that the butterfly could ever fly if she wasn’t a crawling, grey, wingless worm first.

Her wings became strong and graceful because she had to take her time.

Her colors protect her because she grew into the beautiful being she is.

She flies free because she transformed like life always meant her to.

 

via Daily Prompt: Transformation

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Pretend

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You, my love, were only able to pretend that you loved me.

You lived in your pretend world

with your pretend activities

and pretend reasons.

You came home to me, pretending that I was your only one.

And when I confronted you, pretending like you knew nothing.

Your pretend accusations that were only to protect your fragile ego,

your pretend confessions that were to distract me from the truth,

your pretend growth that was only to make me believe in your pretend love…

You can keep them all

and watch as I pretend that I never knew you.

 

via Daily Prompt: Pretend

Silence

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Nothing, yet everything.

No words, music, tv shows or podcasts to fill the reality with noise. No white meaningless noise that would only distract me from this.

Silence.

So quiet that my ears are ringing. So loud that I desperately reach for the electrical device to release me. Give me music! Give me a talking head on the screen!

I hear everything – my heart, my gut, my breath, them, him, you, too much.

Racing thoughts, one after another.

Next one, next one, next one, next…

All of me, right now, here.

My history from the first memory to this moment compressed into these feelings, life lessons squeezed into my current experience of the world. This inner library of personal data that doesn’t just sit quietly on the shelf but distorts my perception, molds my understanding and never stops changing!

There’s no off switch.

Silence shows how terribly and magnificently alive I am and how ignorant I am of that fact when the external world takes all my attention.

The realest reality show,

the quietest talk show,

the most dramatic soap opera,

all in this moment of tranquility within me.

No wonder people turn on their devices, protect themselves by hurrying and never stop. This massive wave of unconscious takes everything with it and they’re afraid of drowning. Extrenal stimuli are like life boats, taking them to what they know, to simple truths and action.

…Silence…

I wait and look at the waves, I listen to the quarrel, feel the extremes, have myself pushed and pulled by the past, the present and the future.

It seems like nothing to you.

It is everything to me.

Silence!

And let me take this journey.

via Daily Prompt: Silence

Daily Prompt: Mistake

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My mistake was

believing every word you said was a critique on how I lived my life

when, in fact, you tried to push me.

My mistake was to fight the push,

to struggle against the power that took me forward

to want to stay here and now, just like this,

because the idea of change translated into dissatisfaction.

The mistake was mental,

a twisted belief that the greatest love is just to let someone be.

But isn’t it love to take the chance of being misunderstood

when wanting to be the drive for growth and transcendence,

to initiate the most frightening processes in someone’s life

and standing right there, pushing, yet ready to catch the falling.

You made the same mistake

but you fought my push differently.

Because I pushed you as a person,

I made you face your inner fight,

whereas you wanted me to fight the world.

My other mistake was to forgive you

walking out of that war.

I was there, by your side, pushing you but always ready to catch you.

Make no mistake in thinking

that I wouldn’t have taken all the hits in that fight for you.

 

via Daily Prompt: Mistake